so this is the new year, i don't feel any different..

maybe my age has caught up with me. i don't know, but i've been caught in situations where i have to reveal my age quite a fair amount of times just this month. not that i'm hiding behind anything, but the frequency of this social play makes me think of what the numbers mean.

twenty. seven. this. year. well. actually. in. september.

i'm really still twenty six. you might think it's just a number.. but twenty seven is a rather iconic number when it comes to rock and roll history:

kurt cobain, jimi hendrix, janis joplin, graham parsons, jim morrison.. they all passed away at twenty seven. and i used to joke that i too would go like these icons at the grand age of twenty seven.

and now.. i'm just nine months away from actually being that age.

i guess i used to associate being twenty seven with a sense of accomplishment. people who were at the peaks of the musical careers.. that when they passed, history can't help but remember them for their stunning contributions to culture. in a sense, i also misplacingly see them as somewhat lucky, that they don't have to deal with the come down after such a high. but then again, so many of them killed themselves in one way or another.

but back to "success". i guess there have been some. working in one of the best worldwide public relations agencies, specialising in a relatively new field of communications, Leeson has already played Baybeats, i'm sort of meeting and making friends with people in the local music scene.. and yeah.. wow.. i'd never thought i'd be this "grown up".



but i couldn't have done it without the grace of God. it's not that i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, for every single one of those moments i'm proud of.. it's involved a lot of work and dedication, struggle even.. with people and even wrestling with God to make sense of way i was in life.. when i couldn't really see how it was all gonna end up. but the refreshing thing about completing your journeys and trials, is that you can look back, take stock.. see what you did or didn't miss out on. but to be able to complete a journey, to be encouraged when it seems like you're the only one facing struggles, when you're alone in your fight.. those are times when God's with you.. through the good and the bad. in fact, you don't keep fighting because you want to get something out of it.. but you go through it because it seemed to be the right thing to do.. and you felt compelled to get through it. i think that compulsion comes from knowing God, and having faith that what you're doing is the right thing.