Saturday, July 17, 2004

exposed
first word that caught my eye as i noticed the spool of medium-format film standing upright on my desk. oh yes, as part of the treasure hunt in melbourne, i have recently acquired a holga and can probably finally take snaps. something this blog has been  missing out on. it aint digital, so bear with the slowness of it all. but yeah, we were made for exciting times. *heh*
 
so yeah, after 10 days in melbourne, not doing any QT for the 10 nights or days, not going to church on a sunday, i do feel physically distant from God. wot am i talking about? physically distant? frankly, one dim way to describe that feeling, is that the distance feels so real, its as if i'm really in one country and he's in another. its so tangible in the unseen that it can be felt. and it may have come in a culmination at today's intensity meeting, when being physically tired as well, that ironically enough the intensity of worship just wasn't there for me. oooh, i guess i could've been missing out on something standing on the sidelines.
 
but i'm glad that worship's not about how you feel on any given day. we've heard this a thousand times perhaps, but i'll re-iterate it for the sake that mebbe it might make an impact on anyone who reads this. worship is independant of the way we feel. it's not that we're hypocritical, and when we don't feel like worshipping, we just shut off. simply because He is God, and who gave us the authority to decide of God Himself dosen't deserve worship and praise where it is due. in fact, who are we to even worship God? when someone says it is a privillage, its not in the context that we live in a tolerant multicultural society (for those of us who do), it's because He has saved us, and clothed in His righteousness, we are made worthy to enter His courts of praise. can i say that again? made worthy. so yeah, hey... i can't sort my life on my own to make myself worthy to enter the inner courts, the Saviour has redeemed us.
 
worship, it's more than a song.

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