flights of fancy
today we were off to the glebe markets, which is kinda like a flea mart, but it was way cool. i dunno, nothing in perth even compares to that right now, or perhaps im not looking hard enough. dunno, being in this part of sydney makes me wish there was more in perth, because perth just feels like a get married and have kids sort of place. nothing against that, its just that its not wot i want no.w. now, i just wanna milk the most for all its worth, because there's no sense going thru life half-hearted. you got one shot, and even the 'legacy' you leave behind don't mean much. or nothing even. i never understood that. i wonder if we are inherently born with a need that needs to be filled, that need of acknowledgment that doesn't disappear in death. because this 'legacy' thing feels even more like a flight of fancy than believing in the afterlife. you exist in people's hearts after you die, and thus your memory lives on. very manigmous. but as politically correct as that sounds, think for a moment if that is our inherent characteristic? or are we created with a sort of 'selfish desire' to be acknowledged, that if we are to 'exist forever', it would actually mean just that itself and not some over-romanticsed notion of memory? let's not just get too caught up in the fluff, and forget the stanky hole we are born into.

why

ESFP - The Performer You scored 72% I to E, 52% N to S, 23% F to T, and 57% J to P!

Your type is called the performer, and you very much feel "all the world's a stage". Your type is part of a larger category called experiencers or artisans. You are playful and funloving, and wish to help all those around you lighten up. You radiate warmth and optimism. Your motto is "eat, drink, and be merry". You share your type with over 10% of the population. You don't like to be alone - ever, if possible. You are always up on what is new and hot. As a romantic partner, you are fun and affectionate, leading an active life full of friends. You are naturually happy-go-lucky and supportive of your partner. You dislike confrontation, and will avoid conflict discussion at all costs. You tend to let things go, hoping they go away on their own. You feel most appreciated when your partner is affectionate and acknowledges the good deeds you do, but doesn't make a particularly big deal out of them. Your group summary: Experiencers (sp)< Your Type Summary: ESFP

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 80% on I to E You scored higher than 66% on N to S You scored higher than 12% on F to T You scored higher than 61% on J to P

Link: The LONG Scientific Personality Test written by unpretentious2 on Ok Cupid

don't be burderned by hope
alright, so today woke up pretty late, because i slept late, though early in perth times. well, not that early, just about nine plus, but heyyy.. that's early enough sometimes, depending on how late you sleep. ermmmm, oh kay.


this is the street where my good friend alywin is putting me up. seems like a nice street, very unlike the flatlands of perth.


here we have a homage of sorts to our favourite drinks. it seems there will be some celebration to go on tonight -) ( ^_^)/U*U\(^_^ ) KANPAI!


this is where i got put up for the night. the decor is just so for the celebrations tonight. but i don't mind, i think its awfully trippy, and it calms my nerves.


and one of the other reasons why i came over, to just share in the graduation joys of dear sue. -)

so yeahhh.. feels good to get away from the surbaia of perth, i mean, not that i loathe it, but y'know, mebbe i'm a bit of a city person somewhat, till i start getting bored of it. mebbe its dementia or something. but wait, that doesn't affect you in this way. wonder wot it is, but hey, i like it here! well, somewhat, just great to meet friends from all over the world. tomorrow beckons something new!

do not worry
hey guys, im in Sydney now. we'll keep you posted!

Resting The Noise

Resting The Noise


folkstar snapped another mean picture

if instruments could see, perhaps they'd see each other amidst the noise.

i've just had a pretty full on day editing the camp teaser, which i am pretty proud of, as well as a prayer meeting. so just feeling a tad tired. i'm actually flying off to Sydney tomorrow, and gonna crash at aly's as well as catch sue's graduation on sunday. i haven't packed yet! but im so tired i think i'll just do it tomorrow. hah!

who are the knockers on heaven's door?
exciting link for today:




wedding video. scratched. alright, i'm gonna want to watch dig! the movie sometime, so take note folk in perth. be a sport and watch it with me! paul's turned me on to the brian jonestown massacre, and if you're a fan of the dandy warhols, wait till you check these guys out! you won't be disappointed. more lo-fi, more rule-breaking and more madness than ever!

so after yh and i settled the wedding video, i went down to rockingham with paul for band practice. somehow, i think the drives to rockingham will be something i'll remember in my stint here. in fact, any long drive along these flatlands will remind me of perth life. band practice was pretty good too, we've got two gigs lined up on may 11th and may 15th, and those should be pretty good i hope. today's practice felt good, because it was one of those cathartic practices where the pressure's off and you just allow yourself to flow into the music and not worry about mistakes. just the song and you, strange relationship and how we write music.

and on a final note, is someone willing to eat a chicken cutlet on my behalf? i'm missing it!

a beautiful letdown
i'm back in the editing suites, and i'm just taking a break from it all because moving images have a tendency to make one salivate uncontrollably whenever the editor recognises some semblance of the outside world creeping in thru the dark ridges of the surrounding windows.

work work! and we'll get thru this together..

stopping the lonely lesson of remembrence
i can't feel my legs, standing up for too long. my right shoulder is sore from the corpse carrying position it's been in since the afternoon started. my left eye has been overworked i might go severely myopic in one eye.

spent the whole day at melvin & hui chuin's wedding and dinner, and well.. this is already the second wedding that i've attended this year in perth. it's crazy, because people around me are getting married left right center, and sometimes i'm caught smack in the middle of it.

doesn't help that they're all under thirty, and marriage is already on the cards. i'm 23 and no girlfriend. hahaha, it's a strange thing, deciding when a girl becomes someone you like enough to go after. sometimes, i wonder if i'm too laid back because i'm just waiting for something to happen, because in the past perhaps i'd like a girl far too much too early, and those feelings are always never recipocrated. so this is my heart's way of playing it safe.

too safe though, sometimes you feel as if you're not fighting for wot you believe in, wot you wanna take a chance in. because if it has the capacity to hurt you, it also has the capacity to love you. i mean, how do you put it right? if you're not willing to get hurt, you may never experience being loved? i dunno, something like that. because if i just sit back and wait for something to happen, you don't actually fight, or believe in it? the risk is almost figurative of the reckless abandon that she's worth you getting hurt. that your feelings aren't as important as hers. we would be good together

so someone tell me if i've opened the floodgates to being a helpless romantic all over again.

recovering from the backblows of
hey guys, i just realised that i am awfully embarressed with the snaps below. simply because of the cheesy sub-par white frame thing that all mega-snappers seem to employ. mine's just, wrong. but somehow, i don't wanna take them down, or edit them because as you know while i employ self-censorship on this blog (ie. i have my own agenda and principles and don't just shoot my mouth off thinking this is my blog and if you don't like it you can screw off.), and one of the defining things i feel of this domain, is that once it's up, it's rarely edited. if you insult me on my mindless grapes, i will not take your post off because your insight is not my control. things are rarely edited once their content has been posted, because it is a snapshot of the mistakes we all make. and we don't always go back in time thinking we could change them because we are constantly moving forwards. sasuke once mentioned that his dreams only lie in the past, and i think that's rather sad because we don't have the courage to face tomorrow. one more day to make it right. one more second chance.

gonna be video-taping another wedding later, so i'm just fixing my brunch now and just tieing up all the loose ends that come along with such tasks.

go go emorangers
you HAVE to check this out. mighty moshin' emo rangers. and the ever destructive theme song can be found here! its a real blast, i can't get the song out of my head! go go emorangers!!!

tear out the sun to live in the cold dark afterglow
so. today was a day that kinda came and went. sometimes i'm just surprised at how time flies. when i got up, and just helped around the house a little, before i knew it.. it was already 1130, and i had to go to uni to pick some equipment up. and then off to fremantle because i needed to buy DV tapes from Harvey Norman (5 for $35), but they ran out of that stock, so i had to buy 2 for $24. then decided to walk the markets abit and i got myself an atari t-shirt for $22. drove back home and muddled around till 7pm when i had to pick some folk up for cell group. and once cell group is over, its 11-ish and before you know it, i'm stuck here typing an entry about today. where does the time go! some kind of intergalactic wormhole where aliens drink the streams of time like bubble tea with bad pearls? i don't know.

anyhow, here are some pictures i snapped and just attempted to resize them in photoshop.


this flower was snapped at a wedding rehearsal. just mucking around with the depth of field on my camera. which isn't much to begin with.


derek & arielle, both are just so cute together.


yh just allowing himself to be photographed for my thrill. i think the flash got too much into his eye.

you're quite welcome
y'see right now i'm quite lost in the solitude of sound that seems to be wrapping around my decaying senses. sometimes you can taste the sound, so closely lightly tipping on your tongue. driving your senses mad with ravenous passion. you see, it's not about being scared of wot you don't know or can't see, much rather it's all about just letting yourself fall into that state. that defensive position where all you can do is fight your way out.

bear with me while i figure out how photoshop works, so i can resize these images of mind so that i don't need to use flickr to host them anymore. cuz i may just prefer to host multiple pictures in one post rather than have one post per picture.

and well. i realise that nobody says you're quite welcomed anymore. was just watching lost just now, and one of the characters just let loose that phrase. and it's got sucha casual, yet semi-formal quality to it. casual in the sense that it's totally laid back, semi-formal in that if you don't really know a person, you can say quite as if you don't know if you can be totally welcomed. although it can be argued that we feel totally welcomed to strangers but we don't always know how we feel with someone we're close to and go "you're quite welcomed".

there's nothing to make you start
sometimes people win arguments by just being more domineering. i'd just like to point that out, that sometimes thing don't make sense, but to avoid conflict, people give in to the more stand-offish opponent. is this any way to fight a battle? will calm and collected debate stand up against irrational and fierce contention? scared into submission? my mind is somewhat flooding right now with respect to a certain blog i read that seems to have fired up quite a lot of debate. i somehow feel that when people argue, they/we start being self-defensive and don't really listen out to wot other people say, because we spend much of our own energies defending our own claims. that is why communications is flawed, much less a blog. never ever take a blog too seriously, even though it's so easy to take someone else's point of view as your own, perhaps even taking the popular opinion as the right one. i'd say think for yourself in the past. but now, i'm losing all faith in this human wisdom and would rather encourage you to ask God for that wisdom and give that glory back to Him. because we don't hold any of the answers.

i don't even know wot this is about..

Which British Band Are You?

i hate being compared to radiohead! but then again, they still rock. but i'm not supposed to admit that.

breaking down the walls of annihilating guitars
i guess i'm thinking of wot to say, but my mind's an utter blank right now. just now as i was lying on the bed, i think i felt my brain just processing wot it's gone thru today. basically, i was downloading this manga series, bleach from this website here and more or less reading it the whole day. i must say i like it, and it's refreshing to start reading a new series from scratch because naruto has gone on for so long already.

and so, for dinner.. i'm quite proud of this one, but i had a nice bed of lettuce, quartered tomatos with pan-fried chicken strips and bacon bits. my dressing was balsamic vinger sauce with japanese mayonaise. while it wasn't the healthiest salad, it shure tasted tasty. i especially loved the chicken strips because i marinated them with sesame oil and paparika, and it had this really nutty bite to it. so score another one for me!

rolling off the volume and tone
so today i got up at the crack of dawn. feels so far away.. but yeah, i actually left for church at 645! wahahaha, sometimes i can't even believe it -) but it was for the Lord, glad to be able to do it somewhat. i really am glad for all that's been happening lately in church, and how much we're learning with each new day. how life is a continuous outpouring of worship in all that we do. shure it hurts when there's no payout for our efforts, but when your perspective is more on the life after, and the glory of God that you serve, payouts just aren't the same with the privillege of serving the wonderful creator.

and during the sermon, i was reminded to be careful of hypocricy, that even when i talk about the immense-ness and greatness of our God, am i doing it in a boastful way that i've found out something you havent and that somehow i could even be a better Christian? well, i don't think i've been doing it that way, but hey, it could be lingering somewhere for all you know. but yeah, best to be aware of our own human trappings.



and then we had dinner at jade's place who made the delicious mushroom risotto you see above. in fact, my picture doesn't even do it justice, but take it from me, it's incredible! the next generation of chefs has arrived and i'm glad to know one of them *grin*

and a big shout out to jo-lyn whose birthday was yesterday! i dunno if you read this blog, but i thought i'd let you know. God bless and may He be the source of your joy!

Forlorn

Forlorn


folkstar snapped another mean picture

Sasa misses her beau in Sydney. yet somehow, this image also contains one facet of the multitude of emotions i have.

Wot's That?

Wot's That?


folkstar snapped another mean picture

Just for you folks in case you've already forgotten wot i look like. and i'm actually wearing a new t-shirt! very pleased with that buy, this shade of blue just goes so well with dark bottems. ok, now i need to buy dark bottems. it never ends. and do you think i'm fat???

diamond studded belts of cheese
well, thank you everyone who was praying for my first time leading worship at intensity meeting. it went pretty smoothly, and i've also recieved some good and constructive comments. everything which i could learn from i suppose. but y'know? all glory to God, because none of this would have happened without Him. just learnt so much about seeking Him and obeying Him in wot we do and can do. and multiply the talents He's given us and not just remain stagnant. so all glory to God, and thanks for your prayers too one and all! i am so off to bed now.. -)

My Messed Up Table

My Messed Up Table


folkstar snapped another mean picture

This is why i said i had to clear my table. Can't barely get anything done on this, but hey.. i'm typing most of the time anyhow.

Me.

First Stupid Snap
folkstar snapped another mean picture

This is probably going to be the first and last post i dare put up a sucky subject like this. But you can see bits of my room behind me, and of course my new spiffy camera. And of course the ever present mucking around of colour balancing.

trickling spasms of honey dewed mornings
i think its a nice thing when you go thru your mobile address books and you change people's names from some generic association like "uni" or "church" to the person's actual surname or nickname. i suppose it's a sign of getting to know someone a bit more than just hi-s and bye-s.

if you've noticed by now, there's a flickr stream on the side of the blog. hopefully it'll be changing constantly and you won't grow bored of staring at the same pictures. it's really such a cool addition to the blog, don't you reckon? and my account is even cooler, it lets me share all my albums in different sets and is fully customizable. i think i could fall in love with taking photos if sharing them is so easy. already i've found a really good photographer at this link here.

pull that red string to see it all comes crashing down
so i bought that camera today. and y'know wot? there are so many functions! i'm not a junkie or something and there are many things on my mind, one of them isn't finding out how a camera works.. i think i need to make another list. and make shure i check everything off that list.

well, today i spent working on tomorrow's worship for agape intensity. never done it before, led a band or bunch of people to worship outside of cell. you can't see it from here, but i'm feeling the jitters somewhat. but i know i'm serving God not man, and that is a huge encouragement to me. if you believe in prayer, keep us in your prayers tonight.

lets see now, that list
edit melvin and hui chuin's song
clean the mess on my table
clean the mess off my floor
make dinner
pump petrol
send out chords for worship
buy tickets
get delay pedal back, looked at and fixed
set up bass

that looks about right for now.
i'll post pictures once i find out how the darn thing works.

this is what i mean
incessant yabbering. i'm just blown away by the responses to the tool gag that ran on april 1st here.

i remember dismissing it off as a prank straight away, but some of the responses in there really bowl you over. they talk about how much they know its a prank, but somehow need reassurances that its not a prank.

and the thing that gets to me is how tool fans are always dissing Christians for their blind faith, but i suppose the same can be said about them. in a man like you and me no less. at least ours has some God-like properties. (you gotta believe in Him first though, i do). and yeah, you have to seek reassuarances from fellow tool fans and mjk himself? even demi-human-deity couldn't be arsed whether you got it or not. its ironic, you see the needs of such fans wanting a touch from their gods, and their gods just want all their own time to themselves because it's our right to our own space.

somehow the Christian walk just seems so fulfilling, because where we are lacking, He will fill us and complete us. and its funny now too, i used to be crazy about tool, but i think i havent been too hot about their music in recent months, its almost as if poly-ryhthmns aren't such a high priority anymore -)

we would be so good together
i didn't get the post up last night because i didn't know wot to type about, then i grew tired. even so, i went to watch david lettermen and i was alright for awhile. then i must've dozed off, because when i woke up, the tv was showing another channel.

today's title delivers a wonderment into alternative timelines.

and as i wake up on this cold and frosty morning, where its probably going to get warmer in the afternoon. i'm somewhat reminded that today is the Lord's, and really, i don't have to fill my life with incessant nows just to get thru it.

something dead still in the night
it's about high time i invested in a digital camera. so this thursday, while K-Mart has a 15% discount sale, i'm going to go out and get myself that canon a75 that i've been eyeing. and hopefully make this blog a tad more graphic. i think after three years, you're pretty bored of staring at the same pink and purple pages. i know i am.

so yeah, it's the two week break now, but i think im gonna be slightly busy with my projects, although ive been skiving for the past two weeks. not so good on ya brian.

and in more rnb flava-rd news, d'angelo is cookin'! can't get enough of those smooth as silk grooves.

reasons are all i have left

there was a time when we both were able
to justify complete wastes of time
and throw ourselves like rubbish out into the night
now i have found these reasons for leaving
they come to me like lights in the sky
and they will not fade till i’m out of your sight
you say i have no reason for leaving you say i have nowhere to go
you say i have not one good reason but reasons are all that i know
there’s not one thing that i will be taking
there’s nothing that i want to remind
i’ll probably even run just to make up some time
i’ve got to find a place i can go where
time is not something that i need
i just want my place in that starry night
you say i have no reason for leaving you say i have nowhere to go
you say i have not one good reason that its all a waste of your time
what if i want to see old dreams come around?
if i want to see new night-times come down?
my best chances lie with me finding
my place in that starry night

by art of fighting

black out and blank out the skyye
i totally forgot that may fled had to play a gig tonight, because i thought it was next monday. and its strange to play a gig when your mind's not psyched for it? like you get excited because of the tension building up, but today there was no tension. it was only "orgh, gig tonight? play lor." so, i thought it'd be pretty anti-climatic, but i suppose we did good. got offered another gig this friday by some organiser, but we had to turn it down because there's a uni-cell combined session this friday night, and i'm co-leading worship, pray for me fellas.. i've never done it before, and that wot we do will be all for God (you) and not for our prides and selves. worship's not about wot we get out of, but whose holy name we're declaring.

sunday worship. that's wot i'm gonna call my new emo-styled band. anybody wanna join? lots of screaming and crying too.

there's shumthing in the water
i think i shall add the hunt for red october (1084, dir. John McTiernan) to my short list of favourtie movies, and stuff i'd love to do in the future. i don't know about you, but submarine movies are so cool! all that silence in the film, so gripping. and the tight confines of the vessel. i mean, it's a real challenge to film in a set like that, every shot has to be so tight. and it's all happening in a boat or two, how the heck do you maintain the drama? with a good story that's how. so yeahhh.. feel much inspired by sub films. and having been a bit of a sea-farer myself, it helps me appreciate it somewhat more. -)

missing the missed
these sorrowful days. well, i digress because i just think that it could be a band name once again. my apologies for not updating in here since thursday. lessee now, wot can i fill you in with? well, basically i just felt really tired after friday and saturday night because of some massive days.

like yesterday, we woke up early to go to this authentic french patisserie in east perth for breakfast. and wot a quaint little corner it was! had a blast, and i was also at jon's for a bout of musical education. hanging out with the right people can only inspire you to lock yourself in the woodshed.

and on friday, i just went shopping with maddie at fremantle. i was in a bit of a shopping mood, because i looked into my wardrobe, and it was drastically short of t-shirts. so i bought one which cost me 49AUD. not too bad, and also got myself a belt i had been eyeing for some time now. and just having a blast flaunting it around.

so yeahh, we're still here to stay.. my church here has been blessed by the ministry of russell sage and i've learnt so much from his workshops. i hope to consolidate some of his gems to share with you guys here. so stay tuned!

a sign for our times
wot we're listening to right now

bloc party

m83

interpol

the polyphonic spree

low

husky rescue

the decemberists

something in all of us
wot got me thinking on the can today (yes napo, your theory "ideas come from a can", dated 24 march 2005 applies here), was that you know how with freudian theory, all, if not most men have the castration complex where they fear some sort of imaginary castration and that's wot drives so many of us to do the things we do. because i guess we all fear our fathers chopping our gonads off and wanting to be with our mothers. anyhow, i would like to introduce how the fear of impotence can affect us.

i think men do fear impotence, not just in the biological sense, but basically not being able to perform in any situation. think about it, think about wot society expects of a man, wot it expects a man should be and ought to be. wot deems his success? even in a spiritual setting, wot makes a spirtual man. and for under-achievers, or perhaps very confident men, do we rank our fear of "not performing" high up there?

i've mentioned before, it's not so much doing the right thing as it is about obeying God. if you're doing something radical, people are bound to get angry or question you or not show you support, because you're not conforming. and i don't think God conforms all the time eithe.r

and it just got me thinking (disclaimer: this isn't an attack, just a point of contention and view which is supposed to merit civil discussion and not screaming in lifts - applies to everyone please, thank you.)

if we're meant to have this fear, of impotence but more so infertility.. like if this fear is wot is supposed to drive us, doesn't that mean that in homosexual circles, the fear of infertility isn't so high anymore? but are we meant to have this unthought fear drive us in some way that we don't often think about?

WTF??!!??
link to some loser in NUS enginering bearing his feelings for a girl. wot riled me more was the OCS stubongz who wore his polo t-shirt into the lecture. the daymn war's over! stop reliving your past glory and move on!

a bout of cynicism to play on words
to lie and love is to live.

thought burst
sometimes i wonder how far i would have come if i didn't express myself through the words in here. its as though blogging here is almost synonymous with the performance of my life.

how to find yourself
did you know that you can find something nearby by moving in a spiral? walking clockwise amd taking every right turn until you come back to a road you've already walked on, then taking the next left, then taing every right turn and so on..

(lifted from "the curious incident of the dog in the night- time" p.172 by mark haddon)

doing my bit to save the world

punk rock destroys your soul
on my white table now are some dirt spots, because its difficult to wipe your table clean when there are things on it. on it are my laptop which where i do most of my work and download most of my music. it is also where i am typing this now and communicate with you. playing in the background is simon joyner's happy woman, but next on the list is slipstream's healing hands and soltero's communist love song. in left corner is a tin mug of cold water because it gets a bit dry in my room, and i prefer to stay hydrated. and next to it is also a different water bottle than my purple nalgene one because i left it in spore. i remember it was quite a rushed morning getting here to perth as it always is. adorned on my shelving section of my table are a myrid of photographs, mainly snapped from my holga. but there are two which are not. they remind me of the good things that happened in my life, and they are usually people, like my mother, sister, friends, neighbourhood items as well as mt buller. usually, i don't type like this, but there's something simple they i hope gets conveyed here. mebbe i don't like typing my emotions out all the time because they're usually uncollected and it's not the best way to espress them online. i like to tell people things, because it feels like i'm sharing my life somehow, that i'm not alone in this world. is there fear in lonliness? but sometimes i like being alone. it allows me to gather my thoughts and launch my next attack on the unsuspecting denizens of the world. i don't like being un-prepared and being caught off guard. that is probably why i spend so much time thinking, i like to know how things work, and scrape below the surface. perhaps i should have been an acheologist, but somehow the thought never came into my mind. i ended up studying communications and screen studies even though i'm more a musician than a screen aficionado. but i still can't play guitar properly and i just imagine that i'm a bass player, but really, all i do is play bass. i think that to be a true musician, you don't tell the instrument wot to do, but the instrument tells you wot to do. until you become the instrument, you will never become a musician.

i've overshot the three song limit, and playing now is speaking canaries's menopause diaries. i quite like it, its got growly guitars and falsetto voices. i think i should leave now, because while this is somewhat detailed, i think its terribly boring for you to read it. but i think that's why i wrote it in the first place.

from little things big things grow
i've just had a really good sunday, just being able to have church and chill over lunch with friends, joking around and singing stupid songs. for a moment there, it was like being back in spore again with the :yuen)'s buffet. it's interesting, to grow this much whilst here, and a far cry from when i first came not knowing anyone. so yeah, thanks for all your prayers, and its also my prayer that all of you are growing wherever you are.

bulletin
the crew just finished filming seraphim's gig, and man! their singer's pretty hot.

chilling out to the grooves of voleurs's cabin fever

wot doesn't know if it's going last
oh kay, i had a pretty massive yesterday. well, slept late on thursday night, and had full load on friday. classes and then off to the city just to do a bit of look seeing with ryan, mad addie, melvin and jalene. and after that, there was a great session by russell sage

every step away from the flesh is a step into the spirit.

i dunno, after last night, it was a real challenge to exercise the giftings and talent's God's given us. to step up like Isaiah and say "Lord, here i am, send me." i know i'm the sort of Christian that likes to ease my way into things, flow like water and do wot fits, not be a resisting current to too much tradition if its working. if it's not broken, why fix it? or it wouldn't really matter anyway.

well, i guess the idea is to cast aside wot you think you know, and really listen out to wot God is telling you. and for you to act on it, to be obedient, and allow him to do his work in you.

there are a multitude of ways He'll speak, wot i felt last night was just promptings, and thoughts.. aroused suspicions that this could be it. and if you just allow yourself to respond, to look past the fear of making a mistake perhaps, you'll see gradually with spiritual eyes how God moves in an act of faith, not an act of doing the right thing. it's almost like, once you're sooooo unshure of the validity of wot you're doing that yoin the flesh world, you have to trust God totally to save the situation, that's one way He can move.

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong"
1 Corinthians 1:27

stand differen.t