you just keep me hangin' on
another goodsome day i'd say. once again, filled with inane activity like apply for a job at a record store. and they had me take this music knowledge test, dunno if they'll call me back, i don't reckon i scored exceptionally well on it, but if God-willing, i hope they'll give it to me.

and i stepped into another record store where i asked for the new snowman EP, and the guy behind the counter said it wasn't in the store but that it was out. because he just saw them with it when he played a gig with them last week. and i asked him "oh! which band are you from?"

"jebediah."

"the jeb?" man, i had to backpedal, given some shite excuse of not being around when they were famous, and his friend promptly cuts in

"hahahaha, were famous."

"crap"

in case you don't know who the jeb are, just imagine bono tells you he just saw the new radiohead EP out when they played a gig together last week, and you ask the bloke "oh, wot band are you playing in?"

that's about roughly how big jebediah were in perth.

falling hard and fast



as part of the ongoing campaign to promote elevator, this is the official band bio from hothotheat.com :

They call themselves Hot Hot Heat, and from the evidence of Make Up The Breakdown, the name is nothing less than an absolute understatement.
A sweltering blend of head-pounding enthusiasm, heart-on-the-sleeve lyrics and hard-to-resist melodies, the ten original tracks of Make Up The Breakdown position this Victoria, BC-based quartet front and center among a new generation of back-to- basics rock & rollers. Deft ensemble playing, a firm grip on the short and sweet school of songwriting, and enough swagger and panache for a dozen rank pretenders -- it all adds up to the Real Deal.
Little wonder Hot Hot Heat is generating lots of, well, heat from critics on both sides of the border. In a rave review the Los Angeles Times singled out the groups "angular quirkiness and classic pop structures” along with their “twitchy cadences, elliptical melodies and clever yet emotional wordplay.” “All spring-loaded guitars, stabbing organs and footloose drums,” enthused Spin while The Miami New Times fawned over their “bouncy, hook-laden party music.” The Alternative Press was especially taken with singer/keyboardist Steve Bays ’ “wayward yelp” and the “splendid ramshackle pop” of the group’s songwriting. “The revolution begins now,” was the magazine’s emphatic conclusion.

Which means that the revolution must have begun back in the late 90’s in the sleepy suburbs of Vancouver Island when founder and frontman Steve Bays joined forces with a gaggle of fellow fledging musicians including drummer Paul Hawley and bassist Dustin Hawthorne. “Between us we’d probably been in thirty bands,” Bays recounts, and the new conglomerate might have been Number 31 in the series had it not been for some conspicuous creative chemistry. “We had no idea whether we sucked or not,” Bays continues, “but at some shows we’d sell a ton of demos. We were jamming at home four or five times a week. We didn’t care who heard us.”
The inevitable personnel shifts and career crises’ ensued, but by early 2001 the line-up had jelled with the addition of guitarist Dante DeCaro. By that time Hot Hot Heat had already released a string of independently produced singles, EP’s and albums, including the full-length aggro-epic Scenes One Through Thirteen, but the addition of DeCaro brought a new dimension to the group’s evolving sound. “We decided that synth-punk had gone as far as it could go,” Bays continues. “We started experimenting with different kinds of sounds and I discovered that I could sing on key. I had yelled in punk bands before but I’d never considered singing tunefully.”
The new emphasis on melody and a decidedly pop perspective brought out the best in the band. “Those elements were there all the time,” Bays asserts. “We’ve basically brought together four categories of influences: classic Beatles and Stones; punk rock; the whole singer/songwriter era and anything contemporary that’s worth listening to.”

After six months of intense woodshedding, the quartet began playing extensively, both locally and in nearby Seattle, and it didn’t take long for the ecstatic word of mouth to spread: Hot Hot Heat was suddenly at the epicenter of a glorious revival of essential rock & roll. With the group collaborating on the music and arrangements and Bays concocting a heady lyrical brew, by turns cynical and sincere, incisive and off-kilter, Hot Hot Heat pumped out another indy EP, Knock Knock Knock in the spring of 2002, returning to the studio almost immediately with producer Jack Endino of Nirvana fame to begin work on a full-length album.

“Things were moving fast,” recounts drummer Pal Hawley. “We basically went in with all our live material and just tried to get down what we were doing on stage. There were no tricks, minimal overdubs and just a little sweetening on the harmonies. It was very straight up.”

Cut in six days, Make Up The Breakdown harnesses all the raw energy of the band to a sheaf of consummately crafted pop songs on the theme of unfashionable angst, modern romance and the unfettered joys of making noise. On such standout tracks as motivating “Talk To Me, Dance With Me,” the do-or-die riff of “Get In Or Get Out,” the cinematic sweep of “In Cairo” or the pressurized intensity of “Oh, Goddamnit, ”Hot Hot Heat lay convincing claim to the description of one critic as “the sound of punk teaching itself to dance.”

And the good news is, they’re just getting started. “A lot has changed since we cut the album,” Bays explains. “We’re operating a lot more out of the box, opening up more to our weirder and freakier side. We’re just starting to hit our stride.”

Quite a claim, considering the musical giant step heard on Make Up The Breakdown. But then, with Hot Hot Heat, it’s impossible to overstate the possibilities.

not connecting, not recieving
there's a bitter cold contemplation in perth today, simply because the temperature drops overnight. one night is all it takes for some semblance of hell to freeze over. you wake up at dawn with shivers in your toes and you ponder in your brain, why blankets don't always cover your toes when they're up to your chest. and why they don't cover your chest when they're down to your toes. i've just had a massive offering of -core from weiming, peivn's significant other who dropped in from Sydney. it's great! he should come round more often! hahahaha.. well, i might be going over to Sydney, i dunno.. i'm kinda thinking about it, sue's invited me to her graduation and it would be rude not to show up wouldn't it? plus i guess i get to catch up with old friends like alywin as well. i miss the bugger, wonder how he's doing. writing his face off probably *grin* but yeah, in exchange for the -core, i gave weiming my stash of m83, the spirit that guides us, husky rescue, hot hot heat and many more moodish moments. i think it was a fair trade, i get all the -core i never got to listen to because of all the other stuff i've had to listen to. the curse or blessing of only having one pair of ears. somehow, as much as i make fun of emo bands, i know deep down in myself, a part of me admires them for boldly being the pansies that they are.

tonight on a current affair, i think they're gonna show some retard program featuring a story of whether chivalry is dead because of feminism. i think it's boistrous that feminist assume that chivalry is an act that demeans women because we think they are a weaker sex. i've had the same thought before, being a disgruntled and confused "wot do women want" kinda guy, but in my life-long education of the female species, according to my reliable sources, chivalry is not dead. women want to be treated as women, and that probably means being courteous to and all the like. so guys, keep opening doors for women, hold the lift for them, give up your seats, throw your jackets over puddles, as long as you have no ulterior intentions, i think you're in the safe books. disclaimer: actual results vary as to how much of a 'tard you are. but don't worry, napkin man will save you, or perhaps her from your social retardedness.

and a final thought, are we really such well-exposed people, because as much as we have an open mind, we're still closed to comment and perhaps rightfully and dutifully draw from experience that we have come to have? so having said that, no one knows more than you, and you don't know anymore than her/him.

my fucken gay pose. i just thought you should know..

go mad sneaker pimps

i dunno about you, but the colours just seem to work here. circia kyoto'04

thirst and refreshment
sometimes i think i treat God like a forgiveness vending machine. except this time i've run out of money.

how then shall we say our vows?
the cooler air fills to permeate the soft tangible skin of everyone. i now sleep with blankets, sometimes two, and i wonder if i'm prepared for the coming winter. we're told in childrens' books that squirrels store food for the winter. i'm no such squirrel, probably live like a reed that freezes over once the pond ices up. gritting our teeth thru the cold, we thrive on pain to know we're still alive. masochistic as that sounds, at least we know we're nearing the end rather then drifting along effortlessly. sometimes the difference between living and dying isn't too large, they're both continuous.

last night i watched a touching anime with a central theme of atonement. i'm glad the main character found peace in the end. i guess like i've mentioned before, man knows that he is seperated from God, and tries ways and means toward reconciliation. i believe such a phrase explains almost every action we do to somehow fulfil that gap in our souls. and after salvation, well.. after salvation is the chapter i'm writing now. i remember a book i once read, whereby we inately seek the justice for the sins of our inherent hearts by going thru a series of atonement. i guess we never truely forgive ourselves, because only one person can forgive us of our sins. the concept of sin is not fluff, it's a very real tangible thing deep down in all our hearts if you bother to look. but whether you've found it or not, we are driven to do something about it. and when you realise you cannot do anything about it, you are so so thankful for the gift of grace and mercy.

strangers in real life
had band practice just now, wasn't too good.. but i suppose everybody was just feeling out of sorts.. so it was a short one, we only practiced the set once, and then we became all fidgety. like there was a bad case of ADD on everyone today. mebbe it's the post-easter blues. if there even is such a thing.

anyhows, as i was walking back from uni, i noticed that the sand path next to the sidewalk looked like the shell of a peanut. something must be in the air. and i was just thinking of all the people we observe from a distance and how we're all really strangers in real life.

excerpts of reformission
"...At this time, God spoke to me very clearly, rebuking me for lacking the humility, ministry success, or wisdom to be traveling, writing books, and acting like a rock star flying around the country to stand on stages before crowds..."

"...First, the pastor (who looked like Mr. T) had been an NFL linebacker and knew how to kill people in self-defense..."

"...Second, he taught the Bible verse by verse in a real way, one that enabled me to have a relationship with Jesus that did not feel like he was my lifelong prom date..."

"...I was answering the phone at home in my underwear, since we didn't even have an office or a secretary...."

"...Reformission is a radical call for Christians and Christian churches to recommit to living and speaking the gospel, and to doing so regardless of the pressures to compromise the truth of the gospel or to conceal its power within the safety of the church..."

full write-up found here.

pretty good read, a nice way to spend a quiet evening -) hope it helps. happy easter!

everything gets struck down the list
im in need of a list, or a secretary, or a dictionary. whichever is more pressing. y'know, i think about the new movie that's coming out, and i can't help but think i'm not so funny anymore. not so spontaneous. i feel as if i'm mellowing out, signs of aging. the things i once held dear, i don't hold dear anymore. the people i used to fancy, the songs in my head, the embracing of the uncertain future, they all seem to have lost its mark on me. i know its selfish, but i wouldn't mind dying to go to heaven now, but it's not my call is it? as long as i'm here, there's still time to fulfil one last mission, one last adventure, one last hurrah. and just wot is it sometimes? i know i haven't seen a fifth of the world, yet i feel like i've seen it all. you know it's true, i've thought about certain things more than any of you, that's why i've surrendered to the dead end and not make a ruckus about most things. perhaps that's why im sipping a bottle of beer not fretting about it. yet, everyone's catching up. where i was at 16, there you are at 23. no i won't rest on my laurels, i'm gonna stay one step ahead, because i never understood why i'm my age. i've always wanted to be someone i was not. and that's who i am. your paradoxicals are my logic boards and i will stay one step ahead by being just where i am. but perhaps that's my problem, i just need a new list of things to do, or rather, i need to write a new list because my old list has been used up. and torn in three pieces.

freaky marionettes in the japanese department store

christmas in japan 3 months late

peace mate, it's all good
last night was quite an interesting one. culminating in one of the more funny experiences i've had in fremantle. the lot of us went down to the sail & anchor, where i proceded to my favourite beez neez beer brewed from honeyed wheat, and was recomended wot is not for the faint hearted, but for the faint..

chilli beer!!??!!

before you splurt wotever dire juices that are swimming in your mouth currently, hear me out. this is the strangest malt drink since.. well.. since malt was first brewed for casual consumption. i'm sorry, i couldn't even try to be funny if i tried. seem to have lost that flair, or never had it. my past posts seem a lot more interesting than this.. but i sidetrack. whoops, and this is an interesting experience, so.. it is interesting! lets not write it off yet shall we?

so yeah, chilli beer, can't say i'm a fan. i told kiat it was like drinking cut chili. and y'know how you like something salty with your malt drinks? well, chilli beer made we wanna pour tau yu / light soya sauce into it and just finish it. and the scariest thing about this beer, is that it's spicy. it defies all logic of drinking a cold beer to quench your thirst. the taste it leaves behind is much akin to drinking a can of mace and washing it down further with baking soda.

if i told you that you had a hot body, would you hold it against me?

see, here's the best bit. we got stopped in our tracks by a stranger, lets call him Ron. and he talks us to death for two whole hours!! i don't even know why we didn't excuse ourselves rudely since being polite didnt seem to register in his brain. in retrospect, its as if everytime we thought he was gonna finish talking, he started on another topic and the only thing that comes to mind is

"time extension!!"

when you play Daytona USA. II to be exact.

gahhhh, and he was going on and on about "us oriental guys" being so lucky to snag "oriental girls". while i agree with him on that point somewhat, jeepers, i suppose it was more cathartic for him to let it out cuz he used to date a sporean girl and a chinese single mom with 3 kids, and how "awesome" she was.

now don't get me wrong, we were laughing and joking at certain things. but two hours? mannn.. we were wondering if he escaped from the Psychiatric ward from the freo hospital nearby. still, people far and wide don't come quite as close to Ron. and yeah, if you're wondering, that's the pick-up line he though us in the secret to getting women. *nods*

also more pressing is that, the hitch-hiker's guide to the galaxy is coming to towne as a movie! catch the trailer here!

and to really knock your socks off, the sin city trailer is here. looks like it packs a punch with the double whammy of jessica alba and alexis biedel. and just the entire style of the film itself. yes, movies should be shallow to feed the shallow needs of us consumers.

the letterbox reign
man, i've got a slight headache that i don't know where it came from. i had a lot of sleep yesterday, so im wondering if that had to do with anything. well, only eight hours if you count it right, so mebbe i have a lack of sleep from the previous day.

well, anyhow, i'm still thinking of ideas for wot to be the subject of my personal video project. i feel like doing a video to the music of killing spree. one idea i had as i was walking back from uni, was to follow my friend up from the time he gets up till he goes back to bed. nothing fancy, but just trying to show how everybody can be a star. hurmmmm.. and i gotta find some way to host it here too.

gonna go for drinks tonight, finally!

can't help but feel like this is some sorta japanese family drama serial. and i'm sooo short!!

this is probably why many men envision a woman in a kimono or cheongsam or ao dai as a portrait of beauty

the real 'desperate housewives'. these women dressed us up in kimonos and hauris when we were in japan -)

signs of aging
i think i'm mellowing out somewhat. y'know how in the past you'd have certain standpoints on certain things as to why you wouldn't do this or that (such as NS), but you had to anyway? and now when you hear the younger generation probably complaining about the same things you did not too long ago. you just stand there, jaded, bo-chup and not bothered because you've seen it all. where is that fire and passion that ignited your very being in the past? does the older we get mean we actually lose more of that reckless passion? its hard to say.. mellowing out somewhat.

some kinda über nerd made up of lesser nerds

dry the rain
feeling all over the place, because i thought i'd get to know someone better only to find out she's attached. well, at least prior reconissence revealed hostile forces. anyhow, it'll pass once i get it out -)

also, two new band name ideas:
mon capitan &
sleaver

i caught jebediah with paul just now, nothin' doing. two crazy girls snapped my pic with their silly camera phone. probably some series on lonely people standing by themselves because paul was sitting on the grass with his girlfriend, and i was standing. also i saw them snap some other poor sod in a similar position as me.

but good things to report in the spiritual realm. i'm thinking of joining up with a new ministry that doesn't involve my musical 'talents', but perhaps something even more raw in my heart. will keep you guys posted, if i feel accountable to you. hahaha. and also, giving my japan testimony in about two weeks time. *yikes* can you actually believe i have a fear of public speaking?

i feel especially emo today.

because that's wot brothers do
and i mean it like black people mean it, because it's more meaningful.
this is my official and heartfelt congratulations to my best mate napkin man for scoring a place in a Toronto university for exchange. godspeed yo!

cease and desist
i've always wondered wot it meant to desist. now i could go check a dictionary, but that wouldn't be too fun. anyhows, coupla things i want you guys to check out today.

sleeping dogs lie. just check the trailer out, you might find a few familiar faces in there. interesting to see famous musicians acting in independent films. in case you don't know who they are, i'm talking about brad wilk of ex-rage against the machine and current audioslave. and maynard james keenan of tool / a perfect circle fame.

next up is something funnier courtesy of a friend of mine gi joe: remixed. some of the humour's abit daft, but its hell funny.

and yesterday i was supposed to tell you that i spent my entire day playing splinter cell, plus i skipped one of my classes. frankly, advancing in that game was more productive then attending a useless "production" class where we're not taught anything but spend two hours in a class doing class work while the tutor does something else. probably her own personal film or wotever. bahhhhhhhhhh. but anyhow, playing espionage in an imaginary war is much more fun.

and today i finally had a jam with my band. we've got an eight song set list which is sounding really good! our first gig for the new year is in april, about three weeks away, and i dare say we're starting to sound really good! much stronger material these days, more identity and dynamics. we were also joking and fiddling around with an ad paul saw in the classifieds about a mandolin player looking for a band to play alternative country. we're not exceptionally country, but hey, there are tinges of it. really excited about our material, and starting a band from the down up is hard work. but hopefully we'll generate some sort of a following..

notice
update coming tonight! stupid blogger didn't load my post from yesterday, so i'll tell you all about it later, i'm gonna jam in an hour's time! can't hardly wait!!

splintered
i spent the entire morning playing splinter cell, even skipping one class which i predicted to be incredibly useless because last week, the tutor spent half and hour explaining the roles of a producer and the different documents we require and left us there for the remainder of the two hour tute to type up our own documents. yeahh, i figured sneaking around hostile georgian territories, spooking around as a one-man intelligence gathering marauder in a fictional war much better time spent than twiddling my thumbs at the hippie of all hippie universities.

so yeah, i don't think i even step foot out of my house today, sucha geek filled friday. which i think is one of the 'lil beauties of singledom. that funny bit about commitment. still, having someone share your life couldn't possibly be the worse thing on earth could it? still, there's splinter cell, and a world to save.

anyhows, this thought was brought up at cell tonight. where we talked about our current priorities and concerns versus God's priorities for us in our lives. and if suddenly we were given the resources, which one of those would we actually do first? i guess its a real challenge once again as to our own mentality and the kingdom mentality. i know i'd have chosen my own priorities over God's, because well, that is how much certain things have been weighing on my mind. where your treasure is, there your heart will also be. matthew 6v21. yeahh.. so easy to talk, much more different to actually put it into action.

i just want you to know
funny ditty film found here entitled: how to be emo

found this great website by rob dobi

and i wanna get the kthx t-shirt by leetcore

also, just bought 70 dollars worth of groceries, that will hopefully last me 2 weeks, then 1 week and 3 days based on the different categories of perishables that i bought. but really glad with my buy of lettuce, tomatos, apples and honeydew. enough fruit and greens to last me for the next five days. i'm gonna start eating and snacking healthily! i'm sorry, but sometimes these are the most exciting things that happen in perth. plus, i'm probably being more domesticated than i should. hahahaha.

also, was offered another gig to do video-ing for another church member's wedding. and in the pipeline is also the Seraphim gig on April 2nd. man.. that's quite a few personal projects lined up, i hope they don't get in the way. but i guess it feels somewhat fulfiling that i can use wot i've been studying to a certain use.

and man! its hot in perth today..

all is well on the morning of easter sunday
i was having a little think about that post that i made yesterday. and while i was voicing out against the self-righteousness of christians, i think i also poorly reflected the state of our world today.

perhaps if i'm trying to be too understanding of the struggles of our world and generation, God's standards sometimes forget to show in my typings. hahaha, i don't know if saying that people who surf pornography shouldn't be thrown into jail counts as a support for pornography, but i just thought i'd make it clear.

if we were all sanctified, and somehow, i think in God's kingdom these things will be outlawed. but perhaps i just don't have that much faith in the human species, which is why i said wot i said. our human nature wants to carry on sinning as much as our spiritual nature is telling us otherwise.

i was speaking from the point of view of a non-believer having morals forced down his throat, but i failed to really think to myself, and convince myself, that perhaps if such holiness was meant to be God-willed, i really have no argument against that. can God create a christian state? i'm shure He could, but will he? that's where His infinite wisdom needs to be counselled upon.

dharma was a serious chick
hey folks, check out my latest musical craze from helsinki, husky rescue playing their own brand of sequenced analog.electronic pop. great ambient stuff with a surreal organic tinge. such a force to be reckoned with.

and i know you've been waiting for this, it's the how well do you know me? quiz. godspeed!

who holds the key to tomorrow?
finally done with the wedding video, and mad props to david for showing me the mother load of premeire pro. well, i have learnt a lot, and am hoping to put them into good use some day. video video video! i need a subjet to shoot!! well, just that, i feel inspired somewhat.

wot crossed my mind today, was the issue of christian states. i was at a lecture when as usual, they begun talking a little bit on anti-abortion laws, and laws against drink driving and other assorted vices. now, i've had christians from the democratic christian party come to my church here, to talk a little of their vision of seeing God glorified as head of the state. and as christians, i guess we ought to be happy somewhat, at the utopia of everyone in your nation being a christian, or abiding by christian values. because that is the law.

see? that's where i'd hold my horses a little. i just started wondering, if christian values were upheld in the law, meaning that we would be convicted (serve time in jail? incarcerated?) if we did something against the law. would that mean that i'd get a jail sentence for surfing pornography, or speaking heresy against the church? now don't get me wrong, i am a christian, and i'd hope i'd stand up for God any day of the week.

but if we have laws to upkeep our values, wouldn't that be christian legalism somewhat? and we know, that with the condition of the human heart, having legalism forced down your throat like that, i wonder if more harm than good will be done instead. can you imagine how many people would have a criminal record just because they don't subscribe to the 'moral standards' of christians?

therefore, i propose this as a warning to you my breathren, who call ourselves christians. we can be so SELF-RIGHTEOUS at times, that we forget we struggle the same as the person next to us with temptations left right and center. the same anger, lustful desires or power hungry shifts. we speak spite and malice to our brothers in arms, and the same pride that we are better, afflicts every single one of us. can we actually say we are free of these inclinations? i can't say for myself, and i can't say for you. only God judges me, and we stand by GRACE ALONE. if God finds me innocent, then i am innocent, if he finds me guilty, then i am guilty. but who washes us white as snow? only the blood of the lamb.

so christian states? i dunno, but if you're in a position of power, and you have values to maintain for the glory of God, then i pray we don't abuse our positions on this fragile earth.

the harshest buckle of unoberving speech
well, the wedding was a success, and it was just such a simple beautiful event. its the first wedding i attended in perth, and probably also my first time videographing such an event. even though i was on 2nd cameras.. haha, when you don't have much to go around, you gotta start counting on wot you have at hand. but yeah, learnt alot from david, we're hitting the studios tomorrow to edit our footage together.

weddings in perth are probably generally different from the ones i've attended in perth, and i suppose it all adds to my cultural education. but yeah, it was held at a lovely winery abouts the swan river, and a perfect spotless day. lush green gardens surrounded the gazebo where the solemnisation took place, and just lots of touching gestures by the groom, bride, family and friends just made it such a warm and close-knit affair. friends and family came up with testimonials for the lovely beloved, and the couple themselves just had so much they wanted to share with us on that day as well.

could i think of my own wedding? hahahaha, i'm not gonna get all soppy on you, while i don't have a girl nows, but i do have the family and friends. and it really made me miss the folk that matter, the approval of my parents, the best men, naps & long-gay (i'd have it no other way), the guest list, the music, food, decor.. all the things.. that somehow its just a massive party that you wanna share with those you love, with the one you love.. and i dunno, could be one of the most significant days of your life. either that, or a small quiet affair.. y'see.. it's the people around you that make it count. and ultimately without God, even those people wouldn't count for much -)

and i promise i'll put photos up soon, because i just had a really fun day after church today! we went to east perth after service to have a picnic and slide down green slopes with cardboard boxes! it was sooooooo fun! hahahaha, just a great time to unwind and do silly things. my t-shirt was all dirty and i probably looked like a six year old who'd just finished playing around in the sandpit with the other kids. it was a lovely day, and i hope to put the pictures up soon.

personal artifacts
alright, im a tad jumpy now. perhaps a mix of not sleeping, hunger pangs, silver mount zion and rabid preperation for jame's wedding tomorrow. i have to be somewhere at 0830 tomorrow morning. my first shot with the video camera is an establishing of the hotel the groom is currently residing in. after that, we'll play by ear. wots making me jumpy, is that the camera i got issued doesn't hold the battery in place very properly. so i have to tape it up to keep it in place. i guess i'm really hoping that it doesn't fall it, if not this project could just crumble to pieces. and its strange really, how people have come up to me to help them shoot certain things, when i'm barely and rarely a cameraman. i guess its never too late to learn or develop an eye for things. but really, there's so much to learn, and right now i feel as if there's so little time.

i thought i could do one little 30 second blip each week, but it looks like that won't be happening anytime soon. well not unless i actually start with something. quick, gimme an idea of wot you'd like to see? ideas anyone? if not i'll show you stupid things like my room and all that stuff. but hurmmm.. the thought is appealing. hahahaha, okok.. mebbe by next sunday i'll put a little something up. like a tour of my neighbourhood or perhaps excerpts of my housemates. something along those lines.

in the meanwhile (hahahaha, that phrase doesn't exist.), i'm gonna sleep. well deserved.

it's my birthday present





Your World (Part One): What is your world made of? [boys]
brought to you by Quizilla

i'm just waiting for food to arrive
sometimes i wonder to myself, are we putting limits on ourselves with all our achievements. like as human beings we have fast cars and ramjets, is that as far or fast as we'll ever go? wot if we're supposed to physically surpass our limits? like we were meant to fly, or we were meant to self-heal or teleport. y'know, stuff like that. then all our tools would actually not be helping us, but cramping our style.

and oh, ave, you ought to be glad that the links are working. -p/-)

wednesday morning call
we strive for reality, we struggle to have fiction rule our reality. we want something to numb the pain, to make us believe that in the end everything is harmless. that the hurt we feel today, this condition we're in will one day give way to our darkest phantasy. we blur the lines of reality in our little worlds, approaching it as if we could reset, as if this is mine and that is yours, wot comes in between is all subjective.

wot if i were to tell you that the stage is real, and for all our dreams and visions, playing them out over and over, we never always made the right decisions, and they will have their consequences. for every action there is an opposite and equal reaction. that not everything is harmless, that it bears consequence. but yet, in the end, everything is harmless. at the end, when its either left right up or down. if the end is heaven or hell, wot would matter now on planet earth? if the end is just the end, doesn't that just scare you somewhat?

for those of us who can't grapple with this 'weakness', are we just taking religious drugs to numb the pain, to numb the cravings? that if life were really that meaningless without heaven and hell, wot would this life amount for? wot would helping those around us amount to if all they shared was the same fate as us. are we stronger if we 'get past' and 'out-wit' religious opiates.

or were we created with a stronger sense of eternity than we'd like to admit? that those pangs were actually meant to be satisfied.

true love waits
so i just watched the new will smith vehicle, hitch yesterday. and i'd say for this year, that's probably one of the more refreshing movies i've watched this year so far. it kind of ends of the movie with no real rules of finding love. mebbe there are rules for meeting women, but there are no real rules for finding love. hurmmm, pretty sappy 'moral of the story' moment, still in a bid not to be too cynical, i guess i did enjoy the performances of kevin james the most and found myself rooting for him to succeed.

the thing i didn't quite understand is that all the women questioned their partners the legitness of their feelings. i mean, wots up with that? hahaha, we're such losers we probably needed tips in the first place. does that make us any less endearing? -p are we men THAT scheming and bastardly? well, i guess nice guys finish last, and players first. but that's valid only if this life were some sorta competition. thankfully, we don't always see life this way, and those that are bent on conquest can play their own silly game and i hope that each of us doesn't get played by one of these people. who bathe in their so-called power.

when you've been purchased by the blood of the lamb, you're no longer bound by the 'rules' of this earth, and that's a glimpse of where freedom lies in the Christian faith. not in all our supposed boundaries. mebbe i'll talk more on that at a later date, i seem to be drifting.

and finally. i was a little cheesed off from the final bit where will smith just launches into this monologue about falling and being caught by the right one. i'm a little more cynical, but here are a few of my 'falling' verses over my short stint on earth.

and if you're falling
just keep falling
don't hit the ground

and i'd fall
fall low
follow you down

so you heard it here first, well, even after the movie, but im convinced i wrote those before the script was written. hahahaha, but i must give it to the writers, those were some really good quotes.

the need for fire
i miss gigging. miss playing with Leeson and sharing those moments with the people we love. i hope may fled puts on some gigging shoes soon, because all i want is to be saitated. i guess i need it more for myself than anyone else. ah well, we give in to our own desires every once in awhile. i suppose the wait only makes it sweeter when it finally happens.

today so far was spent downloading mozilla: firefox, updated soulseek and proceeded to get Kings of Convenience's Quiet Is The New Loud. not a bad homebound day if i might say so myself.

publicity
quick! tell all your friends! Leeson is this month's feature article on agingyouth.com! come share in our joy. also, we've been reviewed in this month's singapore fhm. how neat is that? pick up your copy today blokes and blokettes!

standard issue questions
dear Christians, i just feel compelled to say "watch yourselves in the way you conduct yourselves, because the world is just waiting for us to fall flat on our faces, waiting for us to fail. but actually, if we tried really really hard, we probably will fail. so take heart that we walk by grace and salvation.While life on this earth counts, it's not wot we live for."

well, i've had a pretty busy weekend, was editing a little something for a women's ministry event on friday night, and had wedding rehearsal to attend because i'm helping david the main videographer as the 2nd camera. i'm glad to be able to learn off him, because i'm not usually behind a lens. even this semester, i'm not learning much camera work, so this is a really good oppurtunity for me.

and it's also gotten me thinking about how my own wedding might turn out. i tell you, living with girls almost makes you become one. in perhaps the things you think about. i mean, i don't think of weddings in my spare time. i think of nonsense like hardware, software, instruments, news, sports.. i dunno. hahahaha, well.. live and learn like they say. it may be a while before i actually meet someone.

meant to live - switchfoot
"Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous amd succesful"

Joshua 1:8

this was the theme for the new men's ministry in my church here. you mean i've joined some cheesy all-male support group? well, on one hand, yes. but on the other hand, think of it as a bunch of men trying to get serious about God. and that no one's better or more holier than someone else, refraining from judgement, we're all just trying to worship God the best way we know how. somehow, i think God delights in our cooperate worship, when there's unity in the church, that we are really the body of Christ, and behave like a body of Christ. honour God, not ourselves.

we were told to meditate upon this word when we got back. i'd have just crashed on my bed if i didn't feel convicted enough to do something about it. i guess i could write in my journal, but i figured typing was easier. and perhaps you'd like to know too *grin*

oh kay, so yeah.. it seems pretty straight forward, we'll prosper if we keep God's word. and perhaps, in my current state of mind, that's wot i'm getting. to grow as Christians, we really need to be firmed in His word, so that it's not us that speaks, but the Spirit of God. and it challenges us, to really check with the Word for everything that we do. Joshua was a man tasked with Moses's legacy to bring the Israelites into Canan. ever felt like you were living in someone's shadow? or how you're gonna be able to do a 'better' job? is the word 'better' even synonymous with your character? i suppose God's saying that He can and will multiply all your current circumstances if you would just believe in Him, study His Word and live by it. walking in absolute truth, not some made up explanation of the church, but the truth that has been revealed to you by God Himself.

God will change your world upside down, and like i mentioned before, we are so afraid when things actually seem to be good, but are we being shortchanged? are we not pushing God to the more that He can actually do? if you expect God to do nothing, He'll do nothing.

it's true, i dunno how it's all going to turn out, but today in the upper room, you really get a sense of God challenging a group of men, to be serious about the divine love and hope of the God of heaven, earth and everything in between. and though we are afraid, though we anticipate, though we worry about the deep ends, we walk by faith and not by sight.

and so it goes.

hunger appreciation
would you rather never go hungry or live life with food cravings that need to be saitiated?

tiny head hunters


quite easily one of the funniest things i've stumbled upon this year. warning, the humour's a tad dry though, but it keeps you up!

i've just gotten back from the editting suites.. somehow i found strange refuge in new programs, as irritating as they were to figure out.

rocked out ariel shot of leeson in motion

great shot of giam, perhaps unofficial 'sixth' member

thom and me at the esplanade gig

leeson playing the LT13 gig @ NUS. first picture is always the narcissistic one *grin*

the silence is killing me
well, actually there isn't any silence.. but it's one of those silly things you say when you feel like dying. and no, i don't feel like dying, it's one of those silly things you say when you're bored. but no, i'm not bored either, i could be, but i'm not. finally got the broadband up and running, just a few more steps and we could be having a wired/wireless connection in the house. i think it's been a long awaited treat, more the six months without flying internet, sometimes we don't know how we survive but we do. the power of the human resolve. or perhaps time just doesn't wait for any of us, broadband or not. the world just won't wait for us, kinda shows how significant we are huh?

still, it's nice to be needed somehow y'know? i'm glad to be in the free spirited joy of downloading music off pitchfork. its a snooty sorta resource page where you can brag to your friends about all the unknown indie bands you know. although it can be argued how cool is it to be unknown? again, arguable. anyhows, may i firmly recoomend Husky Rescue's City Lights? got me on the first listen, old school electronica. see, that's some of the perks of knowing your shite, you can name drop douches like that. enjoy pathetic denizens! (i am better than you!!!)

that was fun. *grin*

still on a graveyard shift
just got out of a tutorial, and i dunno if anyone else noticed, but this girl in my tute was wearing a necklace with the Islam symbol and i was wearing my Yeshua t-shirt. pretty funny, and we still managed to have good discussion. hahaha -)

oh well, i've just gotten an email saying that my ADSL connection is activated. wotever that means, i'll have a go at it and see where that takes me. this means i don't need to stay in the library any longer to use the internet! which is a good and bad thing.

so last night, i finally watched pulp fiction, and can see now wot all the fuss is. hurmmm.. out of all the QT films i've watched, liked this one the best. like some sorta spagetti western y'know? with a killer soundtrack to boot. well, you can't go wrong with good music and visuals y'know?

and then i set up my bass rig. well, not exactly, just fiddled with my pedals and played abit. tryna get some sorta decent tone out of it. well, its sounding pretty good i guess, running it with a phaser and chorus yields surprising results. can't wait for the next jam to see how it all goes.. sounding like a cross between interpol, mercury rev, dylan, nirvana all at once. really hope i can this slice of life home to spore, as i know i've taken a slice of spore back to perth with me this semester round.

so yeahh, the reason why i like perth so much, has something to do with me being able to start out again. i don't know. maybe i've forgotten wot its like to live at home? because like, during army, i'm hardly home (every weekend), and then i came straight to perth. don't get me wrong, i love my folks to little bits and peaces, its just that when you're 23 perhaps you could do with less of mom's nagging (not that she nags a lot to begin with). but over here, it really feels like a new lease of life, to get it right. i know there are so many ways in which people see me as who i was rather than who i am. not that there's anything wrong, because we'd have to be constantly updating one another's life just to see where each of us are. but it does have its downsides, becauses you're new, nobody perhaps really knows you for who you are. just some casual thoughts, gotta keep this personal somewhat aye?